If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
-Chinese Proverb

okay that last one was too emotional for me..i'm back to normal again..well let's hope so..just going through that emotional roller coaster yah know?..so yah, nothing can cheer up the mood than listening to some nice 80's michael tunes..before all this court stuff he's into..

dude, this marathon training is tiring..trying to keep up w/ my training schedule this week and working overtime is really tiresome and mentally draining for me..ehhhh..but w/ the encouragement of my little sister and boyfriend..i stopped my whining and ran last night..it does help to listen to some good tracks like rocky!! and garden state.. that always eases my mind and let's me have a good run..so yah..the only thing that sucks is that all this running has really taken a toll on my poor knees..i knew i already had bad knees to begin with..but i have to always ice them and elevate them after a run..i'm going to see the doctor on monday to make sure i'm still good for running (cross your fingers..cuz i really want to finish this marathon!!)..and maybe she can give me more tips on how to help my knees out..ehhhhh

man this week just feels like it's going on for-evvvver!...i mean, yah it's finally thursday..but it took so long just to get to today..haha..c'mon weekend..i need to relax..this week's been too much for me..i just want a nice calm weekend..me & lou are going to be movie bums and try to catch up on all the movies we've been meaning to rent..like before sunset/sunrise, and he has to watch meet the parents so that we can watch the sequel next week..woohoo, let's see..oh can't forget the extended version of lotr 3..heheh orlando bloom? what?..haha..yum!..and to motivate me some more..we're watching rocky=P..but i really want to watch spanglish and that audrey tautou movie in theaters..so yah...now that all my christmas shopping is done, i can relax on the weekend..well besides the saturday run w/ jovan, cici & dana..ahhhhh i need the motivation guys!..haha..i've been eating like a madwoman these past 3 days..we've been having all of our christmas breakfasts/potlucks/lunches here at work..toooooo much food..and i of course pig out at them..alright too long..time to finish my rice crispy treat..muahahhaha

The best proof of love is trust.
-Joyce Brothers

you ever get that feeling where the walls feel like they're closing in on you and you're just backed into a corner with nowhere to go..and your only outlet for comfort is to scream..to just let it all out of your system..otherwise you just curl into a little ball and feel like there's no one there that understands you..that you shouldn't have to feel that way and no matter how hard you try not to, this "thing" always seems to find you all over again..it's all a neverending cycle..you're confused..in denial..scared..lost..and alone..or maybe that's just me..

i dunno..i can't seem to understand certain things..and as many times as i go through it..it's useless..what's the point in trying to accept and understand something that will always be beyond your grasp and never shared with you? it's like the more you think you're making the situation better by choosing to finally accept something, in the end it makes no difference..it was never mine to have to accept..no matter what, it would always be there..and the more you try to make it better, the worse things get and you end up feeling crappy and uncertain..what do you do..forget and try to get over it..again..blahhhh..this sucks..

We all dream; we do not understand our dreams, yet we act as if nothing strange goes on in our sleep minds, strange at least by comparison with the logical, purposeful doings of our minds when we are awake.
-Erich Fromm

just want to start off by saying "happy happy birthday joeeeeeeeeee!" hope you have a good day today and command people to do your bidding since it's your special day..haha..

okay, so i had this dream tuesday night that wamu went bankrupt!! and so i need to tell my dream so that it doesn't come true..so i know dreams are related to our subconscious thoughts b/c the night before i was trying to reorder a box of checks and their website was being updated so i wasn't able to..which probably explains the dream..anyways, in my dream they said they'd reimburse everyone the $$ that was still in their accounts..but i had to write a check to pay for something but i didn't have anymore b/c i ran out and stupid wamu was going bankrupt so i couldn't get checks from them..so i decide to apply to my credit union for a checking account..but when i do, they tell me that to start one i need to write them a check for $50..well duh, the whole reason i'm trying to go to you guys is b/c i don't have checks and need them from you..so the dream kept going in circles..i know i was pretty frantic in it..and when i woke up yesterday i was like..whoaaaaaaaa trippy...okay i know that was weird, but it made sense to me while i typed it..haha

duuuuuuuuuuuuuude so me & jovan freaking signed up for the la marathon...ahhhhh i know i was all hyped up for it before..but i scurrrrred now man..i've been lagging on my long distance runs..i've kept to pace with my 2-6 mile runs..the farthest i've ran is only 8 miles..but man..26.2 miles yo! that's freaking insane..ahhhhhhhhhhhhh....ah well..at least i have my free dell dj to play some good tunes while i try to get to the finish lines..yup, free!! cuz stupid dell lagged on sending me a replacement tower and so they compensated me and i chose the mp3player..heheh..so now they're nice dell=)..i know it's not as clean as an ipod..but hey, who can beat free..always the best deals when it's free..woohoo..oh and by the way..who's free on march 5th to cook me & jovan up a mean carbo loaded dinner??hahhaha..any takers???=)