For it was not into my ear you whispered, but into my heart. It was not my lips you kissed, but my soul.
-Judy Garland

Congratulations to the newly married couple, "the Swans"..hahha..my sister is a swan..aww..and now they're living it up in kauai..lucky!..so yah, the wedding went off pretty well..although it was raining, we did get a blessing of sunshine when the wedding began and ended..so that was always nice..my mom likes to say it is all through prayer that the rain stopped for my sister..hehe that's a nice thought. the priest said my sister is one lucky lady for the rain to have stopped for her during the ceremony..hehe...all in all it was a pretty good day..everything went by soooo fast..the reception was nice too..sooo pretty! would've been better if i was able to enjoy the open bar more..i had a couple drinks but they were just too cold for my throat and i ended up having to drink tea for the rest of the night..yah did i forget to mention that i've been sick since the bachelorette party up til now? kinda sucks you know..i wish i was 100% at the wedding..but i tried to help out as much as possible..anyways...i'm just glad everything went well..yay for ate and jason!

and now..the wedding's over..the marathon's next weekend..and i need to really start studying for my exam..shietzzzzzzzzzz...i'm so freaking scared for the marathon right now! i haven't ran since the week before the bachelorette party..everyone says this is good..that my body is finally getting the rest it needs before the run..but man, i'm still coughing..and i'd really like to get in a few short runs before next weekend..i mean..it's like i'm craving a run..haha does that make sense? i'm so used to running cuz of that freaking training schedule that not running makes me kinda miss it..ehhhh i can't believe i said that..haha but it's true yah know?..i dunno maybe it's just me..it usually is anyways=P

duuuuuuuuude i hate being sick! it's bad enough that i'm such a baby when i'm sick..what's said is that boyfriend wasn't back yet to take care of me (hehe but now he is..woohoo=P)..and so i basically just stayed in bed all last week sleeping all through the nights and days until thursday when all the family came over..then i had to finally get my buttocks out of bed and run crazy errands..so yah, i'm coughing out all the yummy stuff now..and since i've been moving into our new building at work..it gets sooo tiring for me when i had to carry some boxes that i was taking home..how sad..so i think tonight i'm just going to rest up and hopefully make it out to tinz's again..and apologies again to cici!! i wish i can see those fashionista's with yah girl! alright..time to drink tea..

Sleep is the golden chain that ties health and our bodies together.
-Thomas Dekker

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh sucks to have the flu during ate's wedding time..ahhhhh more details to come...reminders

-talk about sapphire..hahah catalina?? d-love=P
-"see i told you to wear your bonnet!"
-"i just want to go to sleeeeeeeeep"
-yay boyfriend's coming home tonight
-wedding's are stressful
-i can wing my wedding speech yah?
-shietz...i haven't ran for a week
-i hate being sick

kay more to come later..byeeeee...be sure to always wash your hands and get lots of restesess...otherwise you may be unlucky like me and get the flu-bug=(

I would rather have a mind opened by wonder than one closed by belief.
-Gerry Spence

so it was ash wednesday yesterday right? i went to mass at the cathedral during lunch..got the usual funny glances from people in my building when i got back..i was like..ehhh whatevers..that happens every year..i get home, get ready for the gym and before i leave i ask my mom

me: "umm, hey i'm going to wipe off my ashes okay mom?"
mom: "noooooo, just keep it on chris, everyone else will have theirs too"
me: "fine!!!! it's going to get wiped away anyways w/ my sweat!"

haha, such a brat i am..so yah, right before i get into the gym i make sure my bangs are kinda covering the ashes so that i don't get those weird stares..i have no idea why i was so embarassed to have them at the gym but not at work..so i hop on the treadmill and as i'm running i start laughing at myself..duuuuuuuude i'm so stupid. i look around..of course i don't see ashes on anyone else..but why should i even care if people stare at me? haha, it's not like i don't already stand out at this gym..i'm like one of the 10 or so asian people amongst this crowd of caucasians anyways..how are ashes on my forehead going to change that? so yah, that's when the epiphany struck me that i shouldn't even care..and i just laughed it all off..i didn't even bother to wipe off the sweat on my forehead so as not to ruin the ashes..i wonder if i had black streaks running down my face from them though..hahah that'd be funny..so yah, that's my moment of weakness/shallowness/stupidity..that was all brought to light during my run..does that make me a terrible person?..hmm..i hope not..

so this weekend we're getting ready to take out my older sister for her bachelorette partay in vegas baby..yahooooo..i'm excited..my first bachelorette party..although i think i may find it a bit weird to see guy/girl strippers all up on her..she's my sister..c'mon now!..haha...but alas, it should be all good none-the-less..is that one word?..so yah, tomorrow night at 10pm we fly into vegas..and let the good times begin..muahahhahah..what happens in vegas stays in vegas right? riiiiiiiiiiiight...yeehawoohooyahooyippyky-yay?!!!..ha!..man i can't believe she's getting married already next week..it came up so freaking fast..

Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.
-Jane Wagner

you ever get that feeling where your heart starts pounding, you're incapable of speech b/c you're in so much shock it feels as though your throat swelled up, that feeling of anxiety...where you know you're just screwed?..ha! i'm feeling it right now..i know it sounds drama..but the reality of this freaking test being 2 months away has slowly crept in my mind and is causing a mental breakdown..i should be studying now, i know..but i can't..i have this mental block..it's like..i try to do the problems..but i can't remember how to do any of them! it all looks familiar, but i can't seem to do a problem w/o flipping through the solutions to refresh my memory. my 5 years of studying civil and i need to relearn everything in 2 months..sad isn't it? it's hard when you haven't been applying most of this stuff for almost 3 years..you start to lose it all..

ahhhhhhhhhh i need help..what's even worse is that i'm just flipping through this huge ass manual that i get to take with me to the test, and i'm highlighting things that i know i should know..yet it doesn't make sense if i don't try to solve the problems..which i've been trying to do..haha well, at least for the past 2 hours..but i can't seem to concentrate..i zone out..i check my email..i start playing with the cool new tabs/highlighters/pencils i bought, i take stupid "study breaks"..i know i should get out of the house..but man, by the time i get home it's dinner time and i'm lazy to go back out..

deep breath..relax..everything will be okay..right?..grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

Failure is not the only punishment for laziness; there is also the success of others.
-Jules Renard

duuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuude i have no motivation to study=(..i had this grand 'ol plan that i'd be studying for my test all day today..ehhh and to work on an overtime project i got assigned to me yesterday from work..yuck..so..i got up around 945..ahhh felt so good to sleep in..booked our flights to vegas for my sister's bachelorette party..hehe vegas baby..and then i should have left at 11 to work/study..hahah riiiight..instead i stayed on the computer til 3pm trying to help my sister w/ her honeymoon preparations..when i finally did decide to study, i didn't get to starbucks til 4pm..great..it was a good feeling to be out on my own though..i was like..hmm is this how it'll be when i move out?..woohoo..so anyways..i'm working on my ot project for about 2 hours..then it's on to study...yah..my studying consisted of flipping through the pages..highlighting random equations that i think i could find some use for..tabbing the chapters..working on like 4 really easy example problems..and then 730 hit..and i was like..hmmmm should i leave?..yah i think i should, since i'm getting charged every half hour for parking (that's the only bad thing about l.a..gotta pay to park..dang west hollywood starbucks!=P)...so there you go..my productive saturday failed..hehe..ummm..this is not a good thing..i really REALLY need to study..but freaking a, i don't know how to concentrate anymore..my mind just wanders incessently over the randomest things..like...my mocha frapuccino was stronger than usual, i want to be on vacation, i can't believe i don't know how to do these problems, what's specific gravity again?, manometer/water resources whaaaaaaaaaaat?, we're going to vegas next weekend..yah you know..stuff like that...so now i feel guilty..maybe i'll bring my study stuff to jovan's tomorrow and study after we run?..let's hope so..ha!

alright..time to eat and load up on carbs..attempting a 20 mile run tomorrow..yay, fun?..ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsion, habit, reason, passion, and desire.
-Aristotle

man, big bear ain't no mammoth! haha..i swear i was soooo confident after our mammoth trip about going to bear..big mistake=(..sucks when you catch an edge, fall backwards, your head snaps back onto the icey/granular snow and your left with a bruised ego=P/buttocks and stiff neck..blahhhh...haha oh well..at least we got to see some snow again...hopefully this tahoe thing goes through and it looks to be like more good times..just kinda worried about going when i should actually be studying for my engineering exam..i'm borrowing a lot of books from my co-worker and he gave me most of them yesterday..a whole box full of references and practice problems..exciting eh? seems more intimidating to me more than anything else..i need to reach back into the attic of my brain and hope it still remembers all this stuff..and i need to get my study mode back..it's just kinda hard to do with my sister's wedding coming up in 2 weeks..the marathon in a month (yikes!) and then my test in mid april..i hope all goes well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

speaking of mid april..yes, i have begun my research for a vacation. and i believe it will occur some time in late april to early may..and i think it'll most likely be to costa ricaaaaaaaaaaaa! duuuuuuuuuuude, it looks soooo fun! they have these packages where you'll get to explore the highlights of the country..like going to the rainforests!!! doing the canopy tour! it looks freaking crazy but at the same time exciting! then there's the beaches..the mountainside..there's so much..i'm just really excited..now i'm debating between 5 or 7 nights..heheh..anyone interested? i should be emailing soon once i get price quotes..yahoooooo..i remember i blogged a while ago about places i'd like to visit..and i know the rainforests were one of them...so i'm really hoping this goes through..let's see..upcoming destinations?

1) japan (thinking nov/dec 2005)
2) europe (the good old contiki tours..thinking 2007..boyfriend needs more vacation time!! ahhhh)
3) australia
4) bahamas/caribbean (2006..heheh)
5) kauai (spelled right?=P)
6) and my u.s. cities..like seattle/chicago/new york/d.c./florida (holiday weekends=)!!)

haha..sounds like a lot..we'll see how it goes..just something for me to look forward too..

so me & boogerlou had a conversation over lunch about who is actually happy with their work/jobs..like who wakes up each morning excited to be doing what they do..sad to say we could only come up with like 2-3 names i think..it's kind of depressing..i mean, i bet the majority of us are just working to work..i mean..we need to get paid right? the bills/loans/vacations/rent/etc..have to be paid..but how cool would it be to make ends meet by way of what you love...like sports stars get paid millions for playing the sport they love..when you're a little kid you write essays about what you want to be when you grow up..i'm sure back then we didn't know how it would feel to actually be doing that job..haha maybe it was just me..but i used to write about how i always wanted to be a dentist (hehe only cuz i wanted the toys that we'd get after our check-up)..then it changed to being an engineer..and you know that if i loved it wouldn't be making posts like these..haha..i dunno..random thought..

so anyways..boyfriends leaving for p.i. tomorrow night..yay that he's finally getting the chance to visit there..i think it'll be such a culture shock for him..we'll see..but i know when i came back, it really humbled me..so maybe in my previous paragraphs i should just be quiet and not complain and just make the most of it all and be grateful for what i have been blessed with..i am..it's just one of those wishful thoughts that always pops in my head..*sigh*miss you boogerhead..have a safe trip and i'll see you in two weeks!!!!!!!!!!!!!!=P