Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it.
-Jane Wagner

you ever get that feeling where your heart starts pounding, you're incapable of speech b/c you're in so much shock it feels as though your throat swelled up, that feeling of anxiety...where you know you're just screwed?..ha! i'm feeling it right now..i know it sounds drama..but the reality of this freaking test being 2 months away has slowly crept in my mind and is causing a mental breakdown..i should be studying now, i know..but i can't..i have this mental block..it's like..i try to do the problems..but i can't remember how to do any of them! it all looks familiar, but i can't seem to do a problem w/o flipping through the solutions to refresh my memory. my 5 years of studying civil and i need to relearn everything in 2 months..sad isn't it? it's hard when you haven't been applying most of this stuff for almost 3 years..you start to lose it all..

ahhhhhhhhhh i need help..what's even worse is that i'm just flipping through this huge ass manual that i get to take with me to the test, and i'm highlighting things that i know i should know..yet it doesn't make sense if i don't try to solve the problems..which i've been trying to do..haha well, at least for the past 2 hours..but i can't seem to concentrate..i zone out..i check my email..i start playing with the cool new tabs/highlighters/pencils i bought, i take stupid "study breaks"..i know i should get out of the house..but man, by the time i get home it's dinner time and i'm lazy to go back out..

deep breath..relax..everything will be okay..right?..grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!