Fall seven times, stand up eight.
-Japanese Proverb

why is it that i felt like a bah humbug last night?..hahah geeeeeeeeeeez...i feel so overwhelmed right now..like i have so much i have to do before tomorrow night and i'm no where near finishing...boo..sucks to have this feeling..especially since i'm always like..yaaaay it's christmas time..but this time around it just feels so rushed..and i didn't even have time to send out my yearly christmas cards..i ALWAYS send out cards=(...sorry guys..hahah i know how much you look forward to getting my cards in the mail each year...heheh...i think i just hate the feeling of being rushed and not prepared..i'm anal like that..i like things to be done already so that i won't have to worry about it later..i like it when i don't get stressed b/c then things will just get messed up..so i'm hoping that won't happen right now..i think i just totally underestimated how long it would take to finish up my christmas stuff..seriously...these past 3 weeks i've been running on like 4-5 hours of sleep each night...which is no bueno, especially if we're marathon training..the most important thing i could do is to get a good night's rest..which hasn't been happening..ha!..right now my eyes feel heavy but i'm awake..b/c i keep thinking about the things i need to still finish...boooooooooooooooo!..gotta look on the bright side..when this is all over..it'll all have been worth it=)..for sure..

so yay...i'm excited for the christmas party tonight..i'm sure it'll lighten up the mood i've been in this week..ha...and then it's off to vegas tomorrow morning to spend with the familia..should be lots of fun..hehe especially all our funky gift exchanges that came up this year..the regular secret santa exchange...the gag gift exchange..the useful gift exchange..hehe should be time for some good laughs..always a good time with the fam=)

so i've recently come to a self realization about myself..i've always known that i have a strong guilty conscience..for like the littlest of things too..but lately i've just been seeing it come out a lot more..i have no idea why...like i'll do something..then be like..aww i feel bad that i couldn't do this better or that i did that wrong or that he/she said that..blah blah blah....i think i have like an "i feel bad...." syndrome...it's so easy to guilt me into something..(***side note: uhh friends..family..please don't take that as an invitation to use against me!=P)...but for reals..like i'll hear something..and feel like it's my job to help out..then feel guilty that i can't do more...or if someone asks something..and i totally know that it's soooooooo wrong of them to ask of me...i'll try to be strong and be like..no! i can't, sorry..then afterwards feel an enormous amount of guilt on my shoulders..which is about the time that i would then need to vent to boyfriend or one of my sister's just so that i know the choices i made were the right ones..and i shouldn't feel bad about them..is that normal? i dunno..i'm weird i guess..hmmm maybe it's a sign that i need to work on this, like a new year's resoltion?..no idea..oh well...i'm just confused=P..as always..

anyways..yah so i'm here at work..we keep hearing word that we're not allowed to leave early today..like they used to let us do in the past..booooooo...heheh..well not like everyone's doing much right now..i think the holiday fever has kicked in...and i'm lazy today..yesterday seemed way more productive...oh well..i guess i'll have to make up for it all next week at work..right now i have so many things i'm thinking about..so with that...i'd like to wish everyone a very very

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!

hope you guys all have a great weekend with your family/friends..and to those traveling..be safe!!!!!
and so i'll leave y'all with the christmas song that has been in my head ever since i heard it at one of the malls..heheh enjoy:

Donde Esta Santa Claus

-Augie Rios

Mamacita, donde esta Santa Claus?
Donde esta Santa Claus?
And the toys that he will leave.
Mamacita, oh, where is Santa Claus?
I look for him because it's a Christmas Eve.

I know that I should be sleeping,
But maybe he's not far away,
Out of the window I'm peeping,
Hoping to see him in his sleigh.

I hope he won't forget to clack his castinet,
And to his reindeer, say,
"Oh Pancho, Oh! Vixen, Oh! Pedro, Oh! Blitzen,"
Ole! Ole! Ole! cha cha cha.

Mamacita, donde esta Santa Claus?
Oh! Where is Santa Claus?
It's Christmas Eve.

Mamacita, donde esta Santa Claus?
I look for him because it's Christmas Eve.

I know that I should be sleeping,
But maybe he's not far away,
Out of the window I'm peeping,
Hoping to see him in sleigh.

I hope he won't forget to crack his castinet,
And to his reindeer, say,
"Oh Pancho, Oh! Vixen, Oh! Pedro, Oh! Blitzen,"
Ole! Ole! Ole! cha cha cha.

Mamacita, donde esta Santa Claus?
Oh! Where is Santa Claus?
It's Christmas Eve.

It's Christmas Eve.
It's Christmas Eve.
It's Christmas Eve.
Alright, Mamacita. I'll go to sleep now.
It's Christmas Eve......