Oh, what a tangled web we weave,
When first we practice to deceive!
-Sir Walter Scott

i always thought that came from shakespeare..i guess he just borrowed it? so i've been thinking..i guess a lot lately..seeing as how i've been a sickly coughing bedridden bum since saturday=(.. what more could i do? (yah i got sick again...booooooo!!!)..hahha....anyways..i've come to realize how much i totally value honesty..well duh doesn't everyone? but i mean like really..i take it to heart and offensively if someone has the audacity to lie to me, especially those i consider very near and dear to me..and if that does happen, i have this tendency to just blow them off..i guess i used to always be this person who trusts in the beginning and if you falter, then that trust will slowly diminish..now because of past/present circumstances, i think i'm slowly becoming those who give you zero trust in the beginning, and you just have to earn it..harsh? well it's either one or the other right?

i dunno..call it a protective barrier or whatever..but who wants to get hurt in the long run? and i'm not saying i've always been the honest person..ha, i've told my fair share of white lies..hmm why are they called white lies?..but yah, you know..the lies to the parentals to get out of the house..the excuses to get out of something you don't want to do...yada yada..but when it comes down to it, i don't think i've ever lied that would intentionally hurt someone in the end..make sense? i guess when i have been lied to, it's so hard for me to trust again 100%..in the back of my mind there's always this nagging voice telling me that they f-d up, it'll just happen again..but at the same time, you figure if the person is worth it..then you'd give that second chance and start again..i can forgive..but i can't forget..like cici always says..must be the scorpion sting in me?..ha..you've been warned=)..so please, to stay in my good book..just don't lie..it's not becoming of you=P.. and it's not hard to do right?..right?

ahh don't want to think so much right now..as if catching up on my work isn't making my head dizzy enough..i really hope i'm well by the weekend..cuz we get to congratulate the soon to be dr. romey-shmoe in san jose!!!..future chiropracter of america..hahah..craziness! hopefully we get to hang out with my favorite jenn-tot too..miss that girl!..aaaaaaaand i hope i'm better b/c i'd hate to not see lou's newborn nephew isiah..well i guess all the pictures i'm sure boyfriend will take would be okay for me too..but awww i love newborns and when they have that baby smell! but if i have any ounce of sickness in me, i shall stay away b/c i'd hate for the baby to get sick!!!

so it's crunch time for the exam..about a little over a month to go..sometimes i wonder if all this studying and stress is worth the exam..maybe i should go to a fortune teller..ha, maybe then i can find out if i have any chance at all of at least passing one portion of the test..then i'd be at ease=)..well wouldn't we all?..

i just got word from work that they want to do a charity powder puff game..and maybe a charity softball game..shall i participate? i'm really curious to see how our girls football team would look like..but umm..like a few of you know..i uhh can get a little competitive..hahah..grrreat..so we'll see..anyone interested?...april 30..mark your calendars..or maybe not, haha don't want to get all embarassed=P.